


Not Broken

by aimarooney



Series: Pride 2020 [5]
Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: Asexual Reader, Comfort, Gen, Pride, Pride 2020, lesbian reader, platonic doctor and reader
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-21
Updated: 2020-06-21
Packaged: 2021-03-04 06:13:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,108
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24845116
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aimarooney/pseuds/aimarooney
Summary: Requested by anon on Tumblr: For the pride event, maybe something where the reader goes to the EMH (Star Trek VOY) and she tells him she thinks she’s broken? And when he asks why, she comes out as an asexual lesbian? I struggle with thinking I’m broken, but I’m doing my best to stop. The EMH is one of my biggest comfort characters, so yeah. Sorry if this is too much, and thank you so very much if you can write this!!!
Relationships: EMH & reader, Emergency Medical Hologram Mark II & Reader, The Doctor (Star Trek) & Reader
Series: Pride 2020 [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1772638
Comments: 4
Kudos: 14





	Not Broken

“Oh my god, he is literally so hot.” Ensign Marten sighed, staring at an engineer across the mess hall. “He is definitely my fuck.”

You couldn’t believe they were really playing fuck, marry kill. Especially when you’re all going to be stuck on the same ship for possibly the next 70 years. You sighed just hoping they didn’t try to pull you into the game as well.

“(y/n)! It’s your turn!” Meghan said, a playful smirk on her face.

“Oh no, I am fine,” You shook your head.

“Oh come on, there has to be some guy on this ship you’re just dying to figure out what they’re like in the sack.”

You scrunched your nose up at the thought. You had no desire to sleep with anyone but that wasn’t something you were going to just tell them. They would obviously try to convince you otherwise, they seemed determined to find someone that you would agree on.

“What about Harry Kim?” She asked, “He’s so sweet, but I am sure that means he has some secrets up his sleeves.”

“God no.” You groaned, “I don’t even like men.”

“Oh, well there are plenty of hot women on the ship!” She said, pausing trying to think of someone to say. “I mean the most obvious. Captain Janeway. I’m straight but I mean I wouldn’t mind a night spent with her.”

You shook your head. “No, she’s not my type.” The truth was no one was your type in that way. You couldn’t stand to sit there any longer. It was almost like you could feel their judgment about you. “You know, I just realized I promised the Doctor I would help him with something. Sorry, I need to go.”

The group gave sounds of protest but ultimately let you leave the mess hall. As soon as you were out of the room you let out a deep breath. You knew you were overreacting and they were just playing a fun game and hadn’t even probably thought much of it but you felt so alienated by their game.

You hated that you felt so different from everyone and that you didn’t feel any sexual attraction to anyone. At first, when you realized you were so far from home you had thought it was actually a blessing. You didn’t have to worry about the messes that you saw pop up with some of the other crew. There were lots of hurt feelings and awkward encounters that you were sure you had avoided, but other times you just wished you felt normal.

Times like today when you were with a group of people who were playing a game that mainly focused on your sex drive, made you feel like you were a strange alien and not a fellow human.

Without even knowing it you had found yourself at the Medbay entrance. You hadn’t actually promised to help the doctor with anything but here you were. You decided that he wouldn’t make bad company anyway and went in.

“Computer activate Emergency Medical Hologram” You stated after entering.

“I’m already here.” You heard the EMH say from in his office.

“Sorry, I didn’t see you.” You apologized.

“Do you need anything?” He asked you.

“No, nothing medical, just someone to talk to.” You told him honestly.

“What do you want to talk about?” The doctor asked you. He could tell there was something on your mind. While you often came to visit him, this seemed different. You seemed more distant as well.

“Oh um, nothing specific, just wanted some company.” You smiled. Trying to play it off. Not that you thought he would judge you but you weren’t sure you wanted to talk about it with anyone.

He gave you a skeptical look, not quite believing you. “Well then, tell me about your day.”

You started by telling him about what you had been up to today but let yourself trail off when you got to your dinner with the group.

“Did Nelix make anything good for dinner?” The doctor asked you.

“Oh, um, it wasn’t too bad, I don’t even think I could tell you what it was supposed to be.” You had been so worried about what everyone else was playing and not wanting them to ask you, you hadn’t even paid attention to your meal.

“You sure you’re alright?” He asked you, “You can talk to me about anything. And the best part is by my programming, it has to stay between us.”

You gave him a tight smile. You looked down at your feet, trying to decide how to even voice what you were feeling. “I-I just” You sighed, “I feel like I’m broken. Like there is something wrong with me.”

“What do you mean?” He asked you, “You seem to be in good health to me.” He even pulled out a tricorder as a means to double-check, causing you to laugh lightly.

“Not like that.” You reached out and pushed the tricorder down.

“Well then, what do you mean?” He asked you curiously.

“Well you know that I am a lesbian,” You started, he nodded his head. “Well, I am also asexual.”

“Many people are asexual, it is a very common sexuality.” He told you. You let out a scoff at that.

“It doesn’t feel like it.” You said. “I feel so alienated from everyone else. I feel like there is just something wrong with me.”

“That is not true. There is absolutely nothing wrong with not feeling something.” The Doctor argued. “The fact that you aren’t sexually attracted to someone doesn’t make you an alien or different from your crewmates. There are many different sexualities onboard. You are very much not alone. And I can assure you everyone aboard would accept you exactly as you are. You have nothing to fear.”

You gave the doctor a weak smile. “I just wish I didn’t feel like I was missing something.”

“Well, I can assure you that you are not missing anything. You are perfect the way you are.” He told you. “And that is my medical opinion.”

You laughed at that, “Thank you,”

“You are always welcome to come in here to talk about anything. But especially when you start to feel this way.”

“I will.” You nodded. “Really thank you.”

“Anytime.” He smiled. You left the Medbay feeling a little better. You knew that you would still struggle with feeling a little alienated, but you also knew that the doctor would be there for you. And you knew he was right, the rest of the crew would be too when you were ready to tell them.


End file.
